I keep thinking about fantasy, delusion, and reality. A spiritual teacher I like was convinced Kamala Harris would become the next president. When Trump won on election night, she said, “Kamala won’t concede! She’ll ask that the election be investigated!” When that didn’t happen, this teacher said, “The election won’t be certified!” And then when that didn’t happen, she said, “Just wait until late April or early May. This election isn’t over! It’s all about to end!”
What interests me is not the content – people believe wacky things all the time – it’s that she kept saying her intuition told her all of this was true. And not only her intuition, but intuitive tools like tarot cards and signs. All of her tarot cards said more would be revealed. And she received sign after sign, things like walking around town and seeing t-shirts and bumper stickers that said, “The End,” which she interpreted to mean Trump’s reign was about to come to an end.
Yet here we are in mid-May and Donald Trump is still president. So what gives? How could her intuition be so wrong? Especially when she received external signs? It’s not like you can make that sort of thing up. Here’s the thing: An incredibly painful lesson I’ve had to learn over and over again is that signs are literal. People read into them, adding in their own layers, but usually, the universe will answer the question you ask.
Let yourself ground in reality, not fantasy. Photo by Stas Ostrikov on Unsplash
Here’s a perfect example from my own life: When I was in my early-20s, I was completely enamored with an avoidant man. I didn’t know he was avoidant because I didn’t learn that term until later, but what I did know is we had a strong connection, yet he ran away from it. He was hot and cold, giving me mixed signals, and it made my head spin. Was this something worth pursuing or not? So I asked the universe. I said, “Who is my soulmate?” and literally in that moment, a truck drove by with just this man’s initials spray-painted across the side in giant letters. It seemed pretty clear to me. He was my soulmate! We would get married and live happily ever after!
Spoiler alert: We didn’t. I thought “soulmate” meant romantic partner but it doesn’t. A soulmate is someone who you have a deep connection with and often impacts your life in a profound way. This could be a friend, a boss, or even a pet. And this man? He absolutely changed the trajectory of my life. It was because of him that I pursued healing and immersed myself in the world of mental health, so much so that I’m a ghostwriter for therapists. I became a different person as a result of our connection. Was he my soulmate? Yes. Was he my “sitting in rocking chairs growing old together partner?” No.
That’s the thing about signs and intuition – we receive information but the interpretation is likely skewed based on our desires, biases, and more. This is also why using our brains is so important. My spiritual teacher says, “The highest treasure of human beings, distinct from other creatures, is their intellectual superiority. Had there been no intelligence in humans, they would hardly be different from other animals.”
He encourages everyone to practice discernment. To use their brains as well as their intuition. Like if your intuition says Elon Musk used his internet provider Starlink to steal the 2024 election for President-elect Donald Trump, to check whether voting equipment is even connected to the internet (it isn’t). Or if your intuition says to buy a car and then you take it to two mechanics and they say the car is a lemon, trust them.
I know it can be excruciatingly painful when your intuition doesn’t match reality. I don’t want to minimize that because these experiences of learning I misinterpreted my intuition have been the most heart-wrenching of my life. And at the same time, reality is reality. I’d much rather be grounded in reality than live in some fantasy land that never comes true. I’ve been in fantasy plenty of times and it only ever ends in disappointment and heartbreak, which is much worse than seeing things as they really are.
I dream of a world where we understand that interpreting our intuition is an art, not a science. A world where we recognize that the universe is very literal and oftentimes we’re the ones that add in layers and meaning to the signs and messages we receive. A world where instead of relying solely on intuition, we also use logic and reason. A world where we ground ourselves in reality because reality is where life happens.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
We are every age we’ve ever been. That means there’s still a 22-year-old, a 12-year-old, a 2-year-old, an infant inside us. Just because we physically age doesn’t mean those younger parts disappear. They live within and they need the same things now that they needed then. My inner infant still needs to be held. My 5-year-old still wants to play. And all of my parts still need to be mothered.
I’m lucky that my mother is still alive and we have a good relationship. It’s something I cherish, being able to call her up in my time of need, whether that’s to hear her perspective or ask how to do something. And at the same time, I’ve had to learn how to mother myself. As Donna Ashworth says, not all mothers are mothers. She goes on to write the following:
“Some mothers are aunts by blood, or by royal appointment. Some are sisters, best friends, with safe spaces for laps and listening ears so large they can hear silent cries. Some are teachers who will be remembered lifelong for all the right reasons. Not all mothers are mothers. And if you have one in your life, you are blessed. They have much love to give. And they are walking around this earth with nurture flowing out of their pores. Not all mothers are mothers, but oh how they mother. And this world should throw petals at their mothering feet, as they teach us all, how unconditional love is done.”
And while it’s true that not all mothers are mothers, and sometimes mothering comes from a friend or a teacher, it also comes from ourselves. It’s the self that lets you cry so hard you start to hiccup. It’s the self that allows the full, authentic expression of who you are without needing to change one thing. It’s the self that says, “I’m still here, I’m not going anywhere.” It’s the self that feeds you nourishing food. It’s also the one that sets boundaries and says, “It’s time for bed.”
We could all use some of this. Photo by Matt Hoffman on Unsplash
Mothering is a constant process because as long as you’re alive, you’ll always need mothering. There’s also the Great Mother, and by that I mean a loving higher power. In my spiritual tradition, we say that divine bliss and grace are always being showered upon each and every being but we don’t feel it because we’re holding the umbrella of vanity or ego over our heads. If we want to be drenched by that divine shower, we have to remove the umbrella.
Removing the umbrella means admitting we need care, nurturing, and support. But it’s also being brave enough to feel it, whether that’s from ourselves, another, or a higher power. It’s being willing to receive that love. But it’s also remembering that even if we aren’t ready, the mother is still there loving us, nurturing us, holding us, whispering, “I’m here when you need me.”
I dream of a world where we recognize we’ll always need to be mothered. A world where we offer ourselves the nurturing, love, care, and support we need. A world where we recognize there’s also a Great Mother that is showering us with divine bliss and grace. A world where we understand even if we don’t feel it, that love is always there and the choice is up to us whether we let ourselves be mothered.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
Lately, I’m noticing how the universe is conspiring on our behalf. The right people are showing up at the right time to help my friends. The things that seemed impossible are suddenly possible. And in my own life, this happened in a big way with my novel.
I’ve been working on a heroine’s journey novel for 3.5 years. It’s about belonging, community, and recovery from an eating disorder. Writing the book hasn’t been easy at all. Shortly after I started, I realized I didn’t actually know how to write a novel and enrolled in a course at UC Berkeley. I joined writing groups and took more courses. I cried and wrung my hands, and wasn’t sure I could write a full-length novel, which, for my category (women’s fiction), needs to be at least 75,000 words. That’s 230 pages double-spaced in a Word document.
Sometimes the writing flowed, but most of the time it did not. And yet, through it all, I felt like the universe was supporting me, and I received confirmation of that over and over again. When I wasn’t sure if my story mattered, I met someone struggling with an eating disorder at 32, and my book is about a woman who struggles with an eating disorder at 32 and finds recovery.
Once I got on board with my book mattering, I still wasn’t sure I could write 75,000 words but I did. A day or two after I hit that goal, I got a call from a client who was circling back to me after a year of not working together. He lives in Dallas but for some reason that day he called me from his cellphone so “McKinney, Texas” popped up on my screen. Do you know where the bulk of my book takes place? McKinney, Texas.
After a friend read my novel, it became clear to me I needed to hire a professional to read it but I didn’t have the funds for that. I prayed and said, “God, if you want me to hire an editor for this novel, you need to find the money for it.” Literally the next day, I received an assignment from a magazine I write for sometimes, that after taxes, would be enough to hire an editor.
Last Monday, I turned in that manuscript to the editor and told my chiropractor it felt like this book wants to be in the world. I went into her waiting room and pulled the oracle card below.
You can’t make this stuff up.
In case you can’t read it, it says, “The word wants to be written.” I burst out laughing when I saw the message because it couldn’t be any clearer: yes, this book does want to be in the world, and yes, the universe is helping to make that happen. It reminds me of a quote/concept I’ve written about before.
My spiritual teacher says that “whatever happens in this universe of ours is nothing but an expression of Cosmic desire or Cosmic will … when a human desire and His desire coincide, then only does the human desire become fruitful, otherwise it is a sure failure.”
In other words, if something is meant to be, the universe will help you. It may not always be easy, because again, I would never say writing a novel is easy, but there will likely be something within you that whispers, “Don’t give up! Keep going!” Or you might get external validation like I did in the form of signs. Regardless, instead of being cold and unfeeling, the universe, or more accurately, Cosmic Consciousness, is loving, supportive, and conspiring on our behalf. And when so much in the world seems to be going wrong, it’s important for me to remember that.
I dream of a world where we realize there is a force in the world that’s loving us, guiding us, and supporting us. A world where we understand that when human desire and Cosmic desire coincide, that’s when our dreams come true. A world where we recognize the universe is conspiring on our behalf.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
I’m recycling this post from five years ago so no, I didn’t interview for a job recently – I still have my own business – but the message about some things not making sense is still valid.
I interviewed for a job recently that sounded perfect for me. When I told my friends about the position, they all laughed because it seemed like such a great fit. It turns out it wasn’t because the company decided not to proceed with my application. It stings and also doesn’t make much sense to me.
I started puzzling why they didn’t hire me, trying to comprehend their reasoning. My therapist told me, “Some things don’t make sense, and sometimes suffering happens.” Ouch. Can that not be true? Thanks. It’s interesting to notice how much I don’t accept this perspective. I want a reason for everything. I want to know why. Why did a man try to run over pedestrians because he thought they were Muslims? Why did someone open fire on a synagogue during a Passover service? Why did a man shoot elementary school students?
Some things you can’t figure out. Photo by Daniele Levis Pelusi on Unsplash
There are lots of possible answers – people are sick, they’re hurting, etc. – but there are many sick and hurting people who don’t kill others. Can I allow myself to instead grieve over the fact I don’t understand why people act this way? My adult self can rationalize ad nauseam, but the young part of me doesn’t get it. Doesn’t understand why a job that seemed so perfect slid away, doesn’t understand why people disappear, and certainly doesn’t understand why people are cruel.
I think part of this is because I prefer to live in denial, or an idealistic fantasy. I mean, I know bad things happen, but I like to rush by them as quickly as I can, like walking past foul-smelling garbage. It’s hard for me to accept the harshness of life.
In my spiritual tradition, we say the word “God” is an acronym. It stands for Generator, Operator, and Destroyer. I can totally get behind the generator and operator part. I’m all about creation and maintenance. The destroyer, though? Surely that’s not God, is it? It is. Black holes are God and death is God and decay is God. It’s painful for me to admit that, I don’t want it to be true, but it’s true nonetheless. This is the cycle of life, a never-ending rhythm of creation, operation, and destruction.
My spiritual teacher says, “An indivisible cosmic rhythm which started from beginningless time marches ahead to infinity. No creature can remain away from this internal divine flow.” He also says that which is beyond the scope of causality is liilá. What we don’t understand, what we can’t explain, is called liilá. I could spend my life trying to figure out things I’ll never have an answer for, or I can accept that some things just don’t make sense.
I dream of a world where we realize we won’t understand everything. A world where we allow ourselves the time and space to grieve the senseless and the tragic. A world where we understand that, too, is God, and that, too, is a part of life. A world where we recognize we are all a part of a universal rhythm.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
I had a poignant experience on Wednesday. First, some context. I’m a Network Spinal Analysis practice member. It’s a technique that relieves tension from the spinal cord with the gentlest of touches. According to Network Spinal Analysis Founder Dr. Donny Epstein, there are 12 stages of healing. These aren’t linear or hierarchical, they’re more like seasons.
Stage one is suffering. It’s an awareness that something is wrong and it’s time to connect with the reality of what is. It’s being with the body to bring ease and compassion to the self. Stage 12 is about community. It’s recognizing that our wholeness comes from bringing our gifts of individuality into the collective. It’s also about receiving gifts from others so there’s a loop of giving and receiving.
On Wednesday, I had a call with other Network Spinal Analysis practice members, and we did breathing exercises relevant to our respective stages. While I did the stage one exercise, the rest did stage 12. Oof. That’s so hard because I take service seriously. It’s one of the core tenets of my spiritual tradition and I always feel pressure to do more and/or that I’m not doing enough.
Sometimes you need to be held by the collective. Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash
And in these times where I know we are the “magic wands,” that change happens because we make it happen, my desire to contribute is immense. It feels like if I’m not doing something, I’m letting the fascists win. But, well, my body needs a break. It’s made that very clear. The breathing call showed me viscerally that I don’t always have to be “on” or giving my gifts. I don’t have to always contribute to society because other people are giving their gifts. Other people are fighting the good fight and when I’m ready, I’ll re-enter the metaphorical arena and give someone else a break.
This is how the collective works. We hold one another as we cycle through our various rhythms.
My spiritual teacher says, “The movement of human beings in this universe is not movement for movementʼs sake, but is comparable to a joyous pilgrimage …. Suppose one among them is attacked by cholera, do the rest go on their way, leaving him behind? No, they cannot. Rather, they break their journey at the place for a day or two, relieve him from the disease, and help him to acquire strength in his legs. Or, they start out anew, carrying him on their shoulders. If anyone runs short of her subsistence, others give her their own. Together, they share everything with all. Together, they stream ahead, singing their leading chorus.”
Later, he says it’s when people “attain a deep psychic affinity while traveling together [this is what] helps them solve all the problems in their individual and social lives.” It’s humbling to admit that sometimes I’m the person who has cholera, metaphorically, but nonetheless, it’s true. And instead of beating myself up about it, I can relax and remember I’m a pilgrim on a pilgrimage and there’s a collective that’s holding me and holding all of us.
I dream of a world where we realize we all cycle through periods of rest and contribution. A world where we give when we can and let ourselves receive when we need. A world where we trust that we don’t have to do everything all the time because there’s a greater collective that’s holding us.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
This week, I was reminded of a post I wrote 16 years ago so I’m going waaaaay back into the archives. I hope it’s helpful for you.
A friend sent a PowerPoint presentation about a professor holding a cup. The story goes like this: A professor walked into class one day and held up a cup of water for all to see. The professor asked, “How much do you think this cup weighs?” The students answered, “50g! 100g! 125g!”
“I really don’t know unless I weigh it,” the professor said. “But my question is, what would happen if I held the cup like this for a few minutes?”
“Nothing.”
“What would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?” the professor asked.
“Your arm would begin to ache.”
“You’re right. Now, what would happen if I held it for a day?”
“Your arm would go numb, you would have muscle stress and paralysis and have to go the hospital for sure!” one of the students shouted amid laughter.
“Very good. But during all this did the weight of the cup change?”
“No.”
“Then what caused the arm to ache and the muscle stress?” the professor asked. The students were perplexed. “What should I do now to come out of pain?” asked the professor.
“Put the cup down!” said the students.
“Exactly,” the professor replied.
Sometimes we just need to put it down. Photo by Galya Chikunova on Unsplash
I love this metaphor. When life throws something my way, I tend to hold on. I obsess, I angst, I work myself up. But that’s the key point – I got myself worked up. I have a choice in how I feel, which means I can choose to feel differently. This is a tricky thing because toxic positivity is real. Spiritual bypassing is a thing. People will do almost anything to not feel their feelings. I’m not advocating that, but at the same time, what’s my part? Am I turning a windmill into a giant?
It can be hard to let go and a method I use is the emotional freedom technique (EFT), also called tapping. It helps me feel my feelings in the moment and not ruminate on them. It doesn’t always work, but usually, I feel a slight shift in how I feel and that’s always a victory. Sometimes, I combine tapping with Louise Hay’s method of saying, “I’m willing to release my need for ______.” Or even, “I’m willing to be willing to release my need for _____.”
Ultimately, I want to feel better. I want to know peace. As the serenity prayer states, some things I can change and some things I cannot. I can’t change everything but what I can change is how tightly I’m holding on to something. I can do something about my own suffering and finally put the ‘cup’ down and that’s what I want for everyone.
I dream of a world where we strike a balance between feeling our feelings and changing our moods. A world where we use the tools at our disposal like EFT or journaling to process how we feel. A world where we understand that sometimes we’re the cause of our own suffering. A world where we finally put the ‘cup’ down.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
I didn’t attend any of the rallies on April 5th because I panic in crowds. And while I know it’s important to take care of myself – and I would have been a liability rather than an asset in that situation – it’s bringing up a lot of feelings. Because I care so much about society, I feel like a bad person. What am I doing to fight fascism?!? Do I make a difference in this world even if I can’t participate in the way I’d like?
The answer is yes. A recent Psychology Today article states when we do an act of kindness, we inspire positive change far beyond the person we’re helping – not just by one degree but three, according to social scientists James Fowler and Nicholas Christakis. For instance, if you help a stranger with their suitcase at the airport, that person may feel uplifted and, in turn, pass on the positive energy to someone else. The same applies to the onlookers, who, in turn, may pay it forward to their social circles. In other words, kindness is contagious and can spread in ways you’ll never know about.
Also, our social networks are much more interconnected than we realize. As the Psychology Today author Emma Seppälä writes, “You may not directly know someone’s friends, but your kindness can impact them just the same, thanks to the invisible threads of connection that link us all. It’s as if we are all part of a giant, complex web of goodwill, where every action – good or bad – reaches farther than we expect.”
A little kindness goes a long way. Photo by Matt Collamer on Unsplash.
For people interested in spreading kindness, Seppälä recommends doing things like complimenting someone, leaving a positive note for a coworker, listening with empathy, and supporting local causes. Those are things I do regularly so from that perspective, I do make a difference, and I’m sure you do too. I can’t necessarily quantify the difference I’m making – I haven’t saved anyone from a burning building or written a bill to support my community, but I’m trusting the small actions I take ripple and spread.
I’m reminded of a quote I use a lot from my spiritual teacher who says, “If one ant meets a premature death, it will disturb the balance of the entire cosmos. Therefore, nothing here is unimportant, not even an ant.” Later on, he affirms that “nobody is unimportant, nobody is insignificant. Each and every existence is valuable.”
I’m not a famous person. I’m not in a position of political power, but my existence is still valuable. My actions are still important even if they aren’t things like going to rallies or marching on Washington. Every day, I say an oath to help others according to my capacity and oftentimes, that means something small. Will I help topple fascism? Unclear. But as I’m learning from research, my influence is much greater than I think it is. Up to three times more, in fact.
I dream of a world where we realize we all have a role to play in this life. A world where we understand we all have different ways of showing up to help others. A world where we remember we aren’t unimportant, we aren’t insignificant. A world where we understand our sphere of influence is three times greater than we think it is, and keeping that in mind, we act with kindness.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
The other day, a bumblebee landed on my window and it felt like both a message from my Grandma Libele saying, “Hello, I’m here,” and a message of hope. She wanted me to know that joy and sweetness are coming.
It’s hard to believe that. It’s tempting to say everything is awful and to build a case based on real-world events. There are some truly terrible things happening and humans have a negativity bias. We are primed to focus on the negative, and due to trauma (which we all have to varying degrees), sometimes our fears can be front and center. Trauma rewires our brains and bodies so we start scanning for threats. It’s a protection mechanism. All of which is to say it’s easier to believe bad things will happen rather than wonderful things.
However, my spiritual philosophy emphasizes the opposite and points out we’re all running after joy and happiness. We constantly seek pleasure in the finite world from drugs, sex, food, shopping, travel, etc. And not only human beings but all beings seek pleasure. For instance, cats search for warm, comfortable spots so they can curl up and sleep. We are all pursuing joy.
The ancient Hindu scriptures, the Vedas, say, “This quinquelemental world has been born out of joy, is being maintained in joy, and into sacred joy will melt.” I’ve shared that quote a few times because it’s so powerful: The world was born out of joy, is being maintained in joy, and into sacred joy will melt. Instead of being a cold, cruel place, the world can be a beautiful, joyful one.
Joy is on its way. Photo by Dmitry Grigoriev on Unsplash
That’s what the bumblebee was reminding me. In shamanism, bumblebees represent the honey or sweetness of life. The bee was saying, “Yes, remember life is joyful, it’s sweet. Good things are coming, and keep in mind that positive outcomes are just as likely as negative ones.”
Similarly, my spiritual teacher says, “On deeper analysis, we find that every object of this universe is sweet. Sweetness, not harshness, is the reality. [The Divine Beloved] no doubt deals many blows to the microcosms, but that is just to facilitate their progress. Judged from a materialistic perspective, every blow is apparently harsh, but actually it is not harsh, it is soft. [The Divine] is concerned for your well-being, that is why [It] resorts to that apparently crude technique.”
Everything is in service of sweetness, to move me closer to the Divine Beloved that is within me and outside of me. Even the hard things. Even the painful things. Even the baffling things. The loving presence that pervades this entire universe wants me to be happy, wants me to be joyful. I’m being guided to that and the more I can trust that I’m being led somewhere joyful, that life is sweet, the better. The world was born out of joy, is being maintained in joy, and will melt in sacred joy. I am a part of that world so I, too, was born out of joy, am being maintained in joy, and will melt in sacred joy.
When I’m down in the dumps, it’s helpful for me to maintain a little perspective and remember that joy is coming. To hold out for it because joy is the natural order of things even if I have trouble seeing it. Good thing I have bumblebees to remind me.
I dream of a world where we remember positive outcomes are just as likely as negative ones. A world where we work against our negativity bias and focus on the positive. A world where we remember the world was born out of joy and if we’re not feeling joyful, we can hold out for it because joy is on its way.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
One of my core wounds is around belonging. I would say that’s a consequence of growing up as the “weird kid” but these days I think everyone has this wound. We all want to belong. To be clear, belonging is not the same thing as fitting in. As Brené Brown says, “Belonging is being accepted for you. Fitting in is being accepted for being like everyone else.”
For instance, fitting in is wearing the same jeans as everyone else. Belonging is wearing the jeans you want to wear without fear you’ll get kicked out of the group or teased. Belonging means sharing your authentic self and trusting you’ll still be loved and accepted. I don’t know if this is a hallmark of belonging but for me, belonging is not only being accepted by one person, it’s about being accepted by a group. I may be accepted in a one-on-one interaction but what happens when another person is added to the mix? How about when there are three people? Four?
Things get more complicated the more people you add to a group. I don’t know if you’ve noticed but people are messy and flawed. Inevitably we fight with other people, we disagree on key positions, and then suddenly we’re no longer a part of the group. This happens all the time, even among people who are keen on creating belonging. Do you know why most intentional communities fail? Because of challenging interpersonal dynamics, of course!
It may seem like the solution is to find a different group, to continue narrowing your focus on people who are like you but anchoring belonging to other people is like building a house on sand – eventually, it will collapse. You can’t count on people to provide you with perpetual belonging. How do we find belonging then?
I can’t say what works for other people but what works for me relates to my post from early February about how we are nature. It’s recognizing as Earthlings, we always belong to the Earth. There is nowhere we can go on the planet where we’re not connected to the planet. If that’s a little heady, I’ve been imagining growing roots and anchoring to the Earth but also having the Earth flow its energy back to me.
I envision filtered Earth energy in the form of golden light permeating my entire body reminding me, yes, we are connected, yes, it’s constant, and yes, I always belong to the planet. There can be no falling out with Earth. It’s forever holding me, loving me, nurturing me. On good days and bad days, the planet is my constant companion. And not only the planet.
In my spiritual tradition, it’s said the Divine is your one true friend, your one true companion because it’s with you from birth to death and lifetime after lifetime. The Divine never leaves you, ever. And furthermore, the secret of meditation is to realize we’re being meditated upon all the time. We have love constantly raining down on us whether we’re aware of it or not. The secret of meditation is to become aware of it. One of my favorite blogs about the concept is from a decade ago where I write that we are the beloved. And it’s true – whether somatically from the planet or spiritually from the Divine, we are loved beyond measure and we always, always belong.
I dream of a world where we let ourselves be who we really are without fear. A world where we understand we don’t have to change anything about ourselves to belong. A world where instead of turning to people to meet that need for belonging, we turn to something more constant: the planet and the Divine.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
The most recent eclipse brought up so much for me – I cried buckets and let myself feel grief that had been buried for decades. In general, that happens during eclipses – people are more sensitive and emotional, and things that were hidden get revealed. It can be incredibly painful to look at something you didn’t want to look at. It may also feel scary and overwhelming.
To quote my friend Emma, we have default modes of thinking and being. We don’t question these modes and accept them hook, line, and sinker. And then when you realize you can choose differently, it’s hard to change direction. How are you supposed to let go of something you accepted as true for perhaps your entire life?!?
I can’t say what works for everyone but for me, I’m offering everything to the Divine Beloved. As Tosha Silver says in her book It’s Not Your Money, “The act of offering is a holy process. Anything truly surrendered is indeed made sacred. You’re not just throwing some mess at God, saying, ‘Hey, I hope You can handle it, dude, ‘cause I sure can’t!’ You’re no longer demanding, ‘How fast can I get my order delivered?’ Instead you’re softening and wondering, What am I learning here? How can I be kinder to myself right now? You take that unbearable burden and say, ‘I can no longer be an ego lugging this around like a pack mule. Please show me the way!’”
That’s what I want. To release the things that no longer serve me and recognize there’s a new way of being, a better way, a more loving way. Over the past week I’ve said to myself, “It’s true Rebekah, those things did happen. It’s OK to cry about them. Go ahead and cry as much as you need. And I also want you to remember that this life now belongs to Love and anything can happen.”
Love, love, love. Photo by freestocks on Unsplash
That’s another principle from Tosha’s book – that no matter what happened in the past, you don’t have to repeat it. You don’t have to replay the same patterns – whether they’re internal or external. You can have a new experience. When Divine Love leads, miracles happen. I’ve seen this in my own life with getting into recovery for an eating disorder, but also my relationship to money. I’ve shared before about how checks will appear out of the blue and that remains true. Instead of stewing in financial worry, I affirm all true needs are always met in amazing ways. And because I worked so hard to change my thinking about money, now I’m peaceful about it (most of the time) – when one client leaves, I know another will take their place.
What this past week is teaching me is the same process I used around money from Tosha’s book, I can apply to anything. She has a meditation about offering the burden of money to the Divine Beloved but I’m tweaking it to be more general so that whatever topic you’re struggling with – abundance, relationships, health, fear, whatever – you can cast aside the burden and let Love lead:
Focusing on your breath, feel yourself sinking into the Earth, your body heavy and relaxed. Get a clear symbolic picture of whatever it is you’re struggling with. Now, imagine that you’re taking this symbol to Love itself, however you envision it.
Feel that you’re now offering this burden to the Divine and that you’re saying, “Make me ready.” I’m ready to be shown. I’m ready to open to this, and I’m ready to have this belong to you. I’m ready to allow old restrictions, constraints, limits, and baggage to go.
Take me over and begin to do what my own ego never could. Take me over and begin to allow this change! Let me be uplifted and transformed. Imagine yourself offering the entire burden of this topic to that Force of Love. You may see a word; you may hear something; you may just feel it.
Know that whatever torture you’ve felt over this issue can finally be offered to God. What a relief. You’re finally really offering it, and you’re asking to be shown the right actions, from today onward. Those right actions will be shown, step-by-step, from the inside, all in right timing.
And then, as you’re ready, slowly come back out. Jot down anything that may have happened. Even the smallest message may turn out to be important.
What worked for me is doing this meditation every day until it felt true that yes, I could offer the burden of my finances to God. And now I’m doing the same thing with what was revealed to me during the eclipse. I’m ready for my life to belong to Love. Maybe you are too?
I dream of a world where we recognize we all have default modes of being and thinking. A world where we understand we don’t have to keep enacting the same patterns. A world where we grieve the past but also change our futures by letting our lives belong to Love. A world where we let Love lead.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.